Family Ties
by Daijanna
Summary: There`s a new warden in prison, and something about him feels familiar to Faith.


Title: Family Ties  
  
Summary: There`s a new warden in prison, and something about him feels familiar.  
  
Story notes: The story is set in early Season 3, but there are no spoilers.  
  
Feedback: Yes, please.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Faith, Angel and Buffyverse. Josh owns them all.  
  
***  
  
Left block, punch, right block, punch. Repeat. Roundhouse kick. Left block, right block...  
  
Faith was working out in the prison gym. It wasn`t a first - rate equipment, of course, but it was enough for her to stay in shape.  
  
The alternative was fighting other inmates on a daily round and she really didn`t want to do that.  
  
Okay, she did, but she also knew she couldn`t. Not if she wanted to stay on the right side of the street.  
  
The gym wasn`t overcrowded. Other women knew to stay away from Faith.  
  
It wasn`t as bad as it sounded. Faith should have been feeling lonely but she didn`t. The women who ignored her weren`t of the kind she wanted to socialize with, and there were a few inmates whom she could actually call friends.  
  
The short, pitch-black haired girl approaching her was one of them.  
  
"Hey, Anita," Faith said leaving the punching bag alone and draping a towel around her shoulders.  
  
"Hey," the girl answered as she seated herself on a bench besides Faith who started to do shoulder-exercises. "So, you heard the big news?"  
  
"No. What is it, cafeteria is going to serve not two but three kinds of Flubber?" came a muffled response from beneath the crook of the Slayer`s elbow.  
  
Anita chuckled.  
  
"You wish. No, they finally found a new warden."  
  
Faith lowered her arms and raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Really? I was starting to think old Smithie would be stuck here for eternity."  
  
The Mexican girl shrugged.  
  
"Well, now he gets to retire and never to see a bunch of chicks in ugly blue clothes fighting over cigarettes. The new guy is kinda cool."  
  
Faith frowned at that.  
  
"Cool? You`ve already seen him?"  
  
Anita nodded.  
  
"Smithie said he doesn`t want to spend another day in here so the new guy had to start today. His name`s John Raines. He called me to his office. Said he wanted to personally meet everyone."  
  
The Slayer who was now stretching her legs couldn`t help but laugh at that.  
  
"Boy, that`s gonna take a lot of time. He`s so serious?"  
  
Anita joined her laughter.  
  
"The newbies are always like that. It wears off. I bet even ol' Smithie once thought this was a nice enough place."  
  
Faith just laughed remembering the warden who was almost growling if an inmate greeted him in the halls.  
  
The girls dismissed the subject and started talking about the food in the cafeteria. But, walking out of the gym, Faith couldn`t help but wonder if this new warden would really make some changes in her life. Well, she really doubted it.  
  
And she was really wrong.  
  
***  
  
"Nr. 430019!"  
  
Faith involuntary jumped and almost dropped the brush. The guard`s voice had come as a complete surprise because no one ever came in the cafeteria during the cleaning. That was the only reason she almost liked this assignment.  
  
"Here," she answered.  
  
"Your turn to the warden. You have ten minutes to finish here."  
  
Faith followed the order (something she had gotten used to now), quickly washed her hands and followed the guard.  
  
The way to the warden`s office was long and she had time to think.  
  
The girls who had already been called to see Mr. Raines all said that he had been really nice and willing to help them in every way possible. Their choice of words made Faith wonder if he was one of *those* guys. Helping in some ways had gotten both one of the last wardens *and* his assistan fired. But none of the inmates had said anything like that about Mr. Raines, not even the ones who said they`d slept with Brad Pitt, so it was probably just her sick imagination.  
  
"Go inside."  
  
Faith was startled by the guard`s voice (Again? Damn, she must be losing all her instincts). They were already at the door, and the man held them open for her. So she stepped in.  
  
She had only been in the warden`s office once before but she remembered that it was small, but kind of cozy. This new guy hadn`t changed that. An oak desk, a few chairs, some diplomas on the walls...Yep, same old, same old.  
  
The only thing that had changed was the man behind the desk.  
  
Mr. Raines looked about fifty years old. He had short and dark hair, dark eyes, and, as could be seen when he rose to his feet to greet her, he was pretty tall.  
  
Wait, Faith thought. Standing up to greet me? That was new. Showing respect to the inmates? Weird. She also noticed that the guard wasn`t coming in. Left all alone with the warden? Interesting.  
  
But after a moment she was overwhelmed by an even greater surprise. The warden took Faith`s hand in his own and shook it before motioning for her to sit down.  
  
She did just that, still reeling from the shock. No one in prison shook hands with each other, even inmates who considered themselves friends. It was just too dangerous, especially for the staff.  
  
There were three options, Faith decided. First, Mr. John Raines was new to prison and didn`t acknowledge the risk. Impossible, because no one could become a prison warden without having worked in this system before. Second, he was deeply stupid. But from what she`d heard he wasn`t stupid. Not at all. And, third, he was smart enough to use this simple gesture to throw people off their guards, to surprise them and make it easier for himself to communicate with them.  
  
Faith had a suspicion that it was the door number three.  
  
While the warden sat down himself Faith took the time to look at him properly. He had very explicit features, a strong jaw, big nose. A man to be respected.  
  
He put his hands on the table and smiled.  
  
"I`m glad to finally meet you, Ms..." his eyes flicked towards a thick file on the desk but before he managed to read out her name she interrupted.  
  
"Just Faith."  
  
That earned her a raised eyebrow but the warden seemed to be smart enough not to question her.  
  
"All right, Faith. As you probably already know my name is John Raines, and I am the new warden here."  
  
He stood up, put his hands in his pockets and started pacing around the small office as he said:  
  
"There is a big speech I give to every girl here. And there is a reason for it. I don`t want to be just another guy in the office you all think of as an enemy. I want to be more than just that. I want to be a friend, a father, a school principal if I have to. And you must remember one thing: I am here for you."  
  
He went on and on but somewhere along the ride Faith stopped listening. She knew everything he`d say, she had heard it all before. His speech told her what she needed to know - he was serious about his work, had the brain to actually pull something off and she liked him. So there was no need to actually pay attention to what he said.  
  
Faith had other things on her mind.  
  
The longer she watched Raines, the more he seemed familiar. Faith was sure that she had never seen him before but still... Something in the angle he kept his head and the look in his eyes were familiar. She could have sworn she recognized them but not from in person.  
  
A photograph. Yes, she had seen a photograph of him. A little younger, perhaps? But what photograph? Where?  
  
"So, Faith. What do you think?"  
  
The direct question interrupted her thoughts, and she frantically tried to think of what to say.  
  
"Yeah. That`s cool. All that friend thing. I can go, right?"  
  
She immediately cringed inside. Gee, that was smooth. Why did she always have to say such stupid things?  
  
But he wasn`t mad. He just threw his head back and laughed.  
  
"Oh God. It`s really gonna take some time, isn`t it?"  
  
Still chuckling, he waved at the door.  
  
"Please, you`re free to go. If you need anything, just ask any of the guards and we`ll make an appointment."  
  
Faith`s hand was already on the doorknob when he called for her again. Looking back over her shoulder she saw him smiling and cocking his head.  
  
"Good luck, Faith. It was nice meeting you."  
  
Her body went rigid. She managed to choke out something like "Yeah, you too" before almost running through the door. Once out of the office, she felt the guard taking her arm and leading her away. Faith didn`t mind, her thoughts being very far away.  
  
She had remembered where she had seen John Raines.  
  
****  
  
Faith`s cell was very Spartan. In fact, it wasn`t much different from her motel - room in Sunnydale. Well, the room had had a TV, but the damn thing was never working, so really not much difference.  
  
That was what Faith thought of her current living space when she allowed herself to spend time on that. Now wasn`t one of those moments.  
  
The Slayer was sitting on her bed with an old photograph in her hand and staring at it.  
  
Faith`s mother had been a whore. There seemed to be an endless stream of men going in or coming out of her bedroom, well, if they got to the bedroom in time, that is. They had left money; not much, Celine (Faith didn`t even know her real name) was no Marylin Monroe, but enough to get by if one was being economical.  
  
Her mother wasn`t. She had always spent the money on drinks and drugs. Faith had learned very early how to do a little shop - lifting. Celine didn`t care if her daughter lived or died.  
  
Sometimes, when she had reached the "I feel so sorry for myself it`s everybody else`s fault" stage of being dead drunk, she had screamed at her daughter and told her it was all Faith`s fault. That she had had to start living like that to support a child.  
  
Bullshit. Faith understood it now. Celine was a whore by nature and enjoyed it too much. But a scared and lonely child with a low self-esteem had easily believed it.  
  
Once Celine had gotten a photograph from somewhere and thrown it at Faith screaming for her to look at that son of a bitch who had left her with a child. Then she had passed out.  
  
But from that night on the picture had stayed with Faith. Always.  
  
There had been three things in that package the Mayor sent her after his own death. That weird body - switching thing, the videotape and this photograph. He had known what it meant to her. The only proof that she had a father somewhere.  
  
The picture showed a young dark - haired man dressed in blue jeans and a white t-shirt. He was cocking his head and smiling, his dark eyes looking directly at the camera.  
  
He looked just like John Raines.  
  
It could be a coincidence, of course. Just because he had the eyes, the smile, the stance, the hair...Faith *could* be mistaken. The picture was twenty years old, after all. And Raines couldn`t be her father, he was too nice and, and old...right?  
  
Faith sighed. It was all too complicated. Anyway, if she had learned anything in her life it was that there`s no such thing as coincidence. If John Raines was her father, then he was here for a reason.  
  
And Faith was afraid to think of what this reason could be.  
  
***  
  
"..and she smiled. I know she smiles a lot, but this time it was a perfect smile."  
  
Faith smiled as Angel talked about Cordelia but couldn`t exactly force herself to pay full attention. Her thoughts were still on the `mystery of the old photograph` as she had called it.  
  
It had been two full weeks since her meeting with the warden, and she still hadn`t figured out what to do. A woman convicted for murder couldn`t just walk up to the Big Cheese of the prison and ask him if he was her long - lost scumbag of a father, now could she?  
  
"..and she kicked me in the jaw and you`re not listening to me at all. What`s wrong?"  
  
Faith jumped and glanced at him guiltily only to find him looking at her with concern. Of course, how could she forget - it was Angel, after all.  
  
"Nothing. I mean...Could I ask you a favor? I know you`ve done enough already..."  
  
"No problem," Angel interrupted her. "You can ask me anything. Except breaking you out, of course."  
  
Faith raised an eyebrow, her problems forgotten for a moment.  
  
"Did you just make a joke?"  
  
"I`m sorry, it won`t happen again," Angel said. Faith almost believed that he was serious before noticing the small smile playing in his lips.  
  
"It better not," she joked, but then remembered what she had to ask him and shifted uneasily in her chair.  
  
"We have this new warden here and he kinda reminds me of someone but I`m not sure. I was wondering if you could...I don`t know...look up something about him?"  
  
Angel nodded.  
  
"Sure. I`ll find a way. Anything special, like a place or time?"  
  
"Boston twenty years ago."  
  
The vampire frowned at that but didn`t ask. Instead he started talking about Cordy and how good a fighter she was becoming.  
  
Faith wondered if Angel would *ever* open his eyes and understand that he was head-over-heels in love with that chick.  
  
***  
  
Two weeks later Faith was sitting in her cell and leafing through the file Angel had brought. It had some interesting things.  
  
John Raines had indeed been in Boston twenty years ago. He had started his law-career there after studying in Harward.  
Twenty years ago.  
  
Raines had left Boston and his office five years ago and moved to L.A. and official law-enforcement.  
  
Angel had told her something else that wasn`t in the file.  
  
"There is something suspicious about him, Faith. His career is a little too fast. I found out that he was only the second choice for this job. The first one was mysteriously killed two days before signing the papers. Be careful."  
  
Faith had promised him that. But she wasn`t sure she would be able to keep this promise.  
  
The Slayer sighed, put the file down and crossed her arms behind her head feeling very confused.  
  
Faith liked Raines, and that was the biggest problem. He seemed to be a very good man. He had already managed to turn the prison into a better place. The guards weren`t taking their "preventive measures" (a big name for random beatings) anymore; the food was better; a new and better counselor was hired; and the warden himself could sometimes be seen in the cafeteria, saying hello to everybody.  
  
He was a man Faith would like to call `father`.  
  
But she remembered the last man she had almost called father and how it had turned out. She didn`t want to go that way again.  
  
She was afraid. And angry. And hopeful.  
  
Faith recalled all those nights when she had laid on the floor in her room, sobbing, her body hurting, and holding that picture in front of her eyes, the only hope she had. A child`s desperate hope for a hero to come and save her from her life.  
  
Because that was what the man in the picture had always meant to Faith. A hero who would come dashing in, destroy her enemies and offer her something she`d never had - love, family, and safety.  
  
Then she had grown up and understood that he would never come. That he either didn`t know or didn`t care about her.  
  
It`s funny, Faith wondered, how thin is the line between love and hate. Just one small step, and you`re over it. And what you find on the other side...  
  
She had started to hate her father with all the passion she had. And still never stopped loving him. A weird mixture of love and hate.  
  
Faith had also never stopped wishing to find her father. But the reasons behind that wish tended to differ. Sometimes she wanted to spit in his face, to break his arms, to kill him, to avenge all those lonely years, all those nights full of desperate hope.  
  
And sometimes she just wanted to hug him, to tell him she forgave him everything, to be his little daughter he never knew, to just curl in his lap and be safe from monsters.  
  
To be a child again, but this time a normal child.  
  
Faith didn`t know what to do. She didn`t know if she loved her father or hated his guts. Probably both. But she knew one thing. She wanted to find him.  
  
And right now it looked like she had.  
  
***  
  
The visiting room was light. It was the first thing Faith noticed entering. Angel always came to see her when it was dark. This was the first time when she saw it during the day.  
  
The next thing she saw was the visitor. And that made her swear silently under her breath.  
  
Faith sat down, picked up the phone and didn`t talk. Just stared at the evil bitch on the other side of the glass.  
  
"Hello, Faith."  
  
Lilah had that smug smirk on her face that made her wish to break down the glass, grab the lawyer`s head and bang it repeatedly on the table.  
  
**Okay, Faith. Breathe. You won`t do that, it`s wrong. Just listen to what she wants to say, then go away. Hey, it even rhymes.**  
  
Lilah waited for a moment, then spoke again.  
  
"I`m sure you`re surprised to see me. Let me assure you that we at `Wolfram & Hart` haven`t forgotten about you. Although our previous collaboration didn`t actually work out, we haven`t abandoned our hopes to work with you in the future."  
  
"Yeah, sure," Faith interrupted. "I`m touched. Anything else?"  
  
The lawyer folded her arms on the desk in front of her, the smirk never leaving her face.  
  
"Well, we also think that you need a motivation. How about your father?"  
  
Faith felt her face go pale. **What the Hell?**  
  
"I see I need to be more clear. We can give you your father. You actually already know him. He was given a job here. The warden. By our recommendations, of course."  
  
Oh, God. John Raines *was* her father. And he worked for Wolfram and Hart.  
  
Shit.  
  
"He is one of you?" she asked in a raspy voice, not quite sure she wouldn`t faint.  
  
Lilah shook her head.  
  
"Oh, no. We just found him and offered him a chance to work here. He doesn`t even know it was us."  
  
Faith`s mind raced. He`s not with them, he`s good, he didn`t know anything about this...  
  
"What do you want from me?" she whispered.  
  
Lilah smile took on a triumphant vibe.  
  
"I`m glad we understand each other. The deal is, you agree to work for us - just a few assignments - and we make sure you are free to leave this place along with your father. We`ll pay you accordingly, of course. You will both be able to go anywhere you want. I promise."  
  
**Yeah, right,** Faith thought. ** Free to go anywhere. Not before they use me in whatever way they can. If I take the offer they`ll make sure I work off every cent they`ve spent on me...**  
  
Her father. They offered her to be with her father. He didn`t know anything, he wasn`t with them..They could run away and be a family...  
  
"I need time to think."  
  
Lilah nodded.  
  
"Of course. I will come back in a week and I expect you to give me an answer."  
  
She started collecting her things but Faith hadn`t finished yet.  
  
"What if I say `screw you`?"  
  
Lilah shrugged.  
  
"Then you`ll rot here until you die and we`ll kill your father slowly and horribly. Maybe we`ll even turn him into a vampire and send him in here for you to take care of that. See you next week."  
  
With that, the lawyer was gone and Faith was left stunned and close to tears. She stood up, turned around and, for the first time in her life, fainted.  
  
***  
  
"Faith? Faith! Is she all right?"  
  
Ugh. Voices. Bad thing. No, wait. It was one voice. Raines`.  
  
An even worse thing.  
  
Faith opened her eyes and saw a face looming over her. Yep. John Raines. Her father.   
  
Shit.  
  
She looked around and discovered that she was in the prison`s hospital. Right. The lawyer-bitch, visiting, father, fainting like a little girl.  
  
Well, at least she had a good reason.  
  
Faith tried to lift an arm. Oh. Handcuffs. Right. Blurry thoughts.  
  
Father.  
  
The warden turned around and shouted at someone:  
  
"Hey! She`s awake!"  
  
A nurse came to her, checked her pulse, did whatever it was they did at situations like this, Faith didn`t really pay attention. Instead she looked at her father. He seemed very concerned and worried about her.   
  
Father.  
  
She could have him. Father. Family. They could leave. All she had to do was something she`d done before. Because of a father.  
  
Daddy.  
  
The nurse had done everything she wanted and now turned to Mr. Raines.  
  
"She is all right. Nothing fatal. She can go back now."  
  
The warden raised a hand in a gesture of denial.  
  
"No, no, she must rest. I want her to stay for at least two days. Is it okay with you, Faith?"  
  
She nodded wordlessly.  
  
"Great. You can go, please, I`ll stay with her for a while."  
  
The nurse obviously found it strange but complied. And Faith was left alone with the man she now knew was her father.  
  
He sat down on the bed beside her and took her uncuffed hand in both of his.  
  
"Faith. Are you feeling all right?"  
  
She nodded weakly, never taking her eyes off his. So kind. So good.  
  
**Why did you leave me?** Faith suddenly wanted to scream. ** Why did you go away and never came back for me? Why did you have to show up now? Why did you have to see me like this? A criminal. A psychotic criminal. This wasn`t how I wanted us to meet each other, Dad.**  
  
Of course, she didn`t say any of that.  
  
Raines smiled at her.  
  
"Hey, you`re a strong girl, I know that. I just thought you would like to be here a little and not return to your cell. Maybe you want to talk to me? I`ve got a few minutes just now."  
  
"Do you have any children?"  
  
Shit. Had she really just said that?  
  
But the warden didn`t seem to mind. He just sighed.  
  
"Yes. I have a daughter somewhere. I don`t even know why I`m telling you this," he shrugged, "maybe I just need to tell someone, and I like you."  
  
He fell silent for a moment, and Faith realized that she was holding her breath. Was it possible that...  
  
"I had a girlfriend once. She left me and just disappeared. Her friend told me that she was pregnant with my child. I looked for her everywhere. Once I managed to find a place where she`d lived just a few months before I came there. Her landlady told me that she had a little daughter who looked very much like me. But since then I`ve been unable to find any trace of them."  
  
Faith just looked at him, tears choking her. She wanted to scream out loud, to tell him...  
  
But she couldn`t.  
  
The warden stood up and let go of Faith`s hand.  
  
"I`m very sorry, Faith, but now I have to leave you. Official warden business, you know. But it was very nice talking to you, even if I did the most of the talking part."  
  
He chuckled, then leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. A pure, fatherly kiss.  
  
Raines staightened out his jacket and turned to the door. But before leaving he once again looked back over his shoulder, smiled and said:  
  
"Hold on, firecracker."  
  
With that, he was gone. And Faith was left staring at the ceiling; unshed tears making it hard for her to breathe.  
  
***  
  
Lilah was looking exactly the same. The same outfit, briefcase, folders, the same smirk on her face.  
  
Faith sat down and picked up the phone. Lilah did the same thing and was the first to speak.  
  
"So, have you made a decision concerning our offer?"  
  
The Slayer nodded, her expression firm and determined.  
  
Lilah`s smirk became even more over-confident, if that was humanly possible. But then again, Faith thought, lawyers were hardly human.  
  
"So, let`s hear it, then."  
  
Faith clenched her teeth, leaned a little closer to the glass and said:  
  
"Screw you."  
  
The lawyer`s face was an interesting sight. It lost the smirk, became confused, then shocked, then enraged.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
It was Faith`s turn to smirk now. No matter that she was barely managing not to cry.  
  
"You heard me. Screw you and your big plan. I may not be the brightest person around, but I`m not *that* stupid. Whose idea was it? Find a guy who looked like my father, get him around me, make him play a nice Daddy? Blackmail me with the thing you thought I wanted?"  
  
She leaned even closer, making Lilah flinch.  
  
"Tell him he`s a bad actor. He tried too much to be like Mayor. But it was the `firecracker` that did it, you know. And the whole speech of trying to find me. Just what I wanted, right? Making sure that I don`t hate him for leaving me, justifying everything..."  
  
Faith`s smirk faded.  
  
"Nothing is that easy. My father was a jerk. I accept it now. Your guy was too perfect to be real. Too good to be my father."  
  
She stood up, still holding the phone.  
  
"I don`t care what you do to him. Just make sure that I never see any of you here again. Get it in your thick scull, Lilah - I am not coming back. I will never work for you. Deal with it and move on."  
  
She dropped the phone, turned around and left.  
  
***   
  
"Faith!"  
  
She turned her head in the direction of the voice. It was Anita, just now entering her cell.  
  
"Hey, Anita. What`s up?"  
  
The girl was panting as she practically fell down beside Faith who was sitting on her bed.  
  
"Did you hear the news? We`ll have a new warden again! Raines is getting transferred! The whole place is just buzzing!"  
  
Faith`s smile was tired.  
  
"Yeah, I guess."  
  
Anita didn`t really listen to that, too excited by the news.  
  
"Nobody knows what happened! Rochelle`s girls are saying that somebody from Sheila`s gang told on him about something! There is a fight coming on! You should be there. See all the fun!"  
  
The Slayer gave a weak chuckle at that.  
  
"Yeah, people bleeding is always fun. Nah, I`ll just sit here for a while, thanks."  
  
Anita shrugged.  
  
"It`s your call. See ya!"  
  
And Faith was left alone again.  
  
For a moment she just stared at the wall in front of her, not thinking anything, her eyes dry.  
  
Raines was getting transferred, not killed. So he must be too good an employee to just let go. Or maybe they were going to kill him afterwards so not to attract too much attention. Yeah, that was probably it. Wolfram &Hart wouldn`t forgive him for blowing up such a project.  
  
She had almost believed him. All she had ever wanted, handed over to her on a silver plate with a napkin attached. A father that loved her, liked her without even knowing she was his daughter. Liked her even knowing what kind of a person she was. A father she herself liked.  
  
Too easy. Nothing came so easy.  
  
Faith lay down on her bed, curled up in a fetal position and cried. She cried like a child for the first time after that night in the alley. Her tears held all her despair, fear, lost hopes, memories of those nights when a little girl on the floor waited for her father.  
  
She cried for the child she had been and for the woman she had become.  
  
She cried for the father she`d never had.  
  
Faith cried because she was all alone in the world. And because she knew it would never change. 


End file.
